Lockdown Week 6 (Fri)

FRIDAY

JEEEESUS MUM, WHERE HAVE YOU HIDDEN MY GODDAMN HOODIE???

Pardon?

JEES…

No - just stop right there! 

This is the first thing the eight-year-old says to me this morning. I tell him in no uncertain terms that this is totally unacceptable, particularly from an eight-year-old. 

He’s generally polite and easy-going, but there are two reasons why he occasionally morphs into Kevin The Teenager. 

One reason is too much time spent with his school friend Harvey – a spirited lad ever since Reception, who chases parents’ cars down the road after school playing 'chicken'. Play dates are terrifying when he and the eight-year-old start trying out experiments with gravity. 

The husband knows to have a large glass of wine ready for me as soon as Harvey gets collected at the end. 

The other reason for the eight-year-old’s inappropriate language is teenage-speak picked up from his big sisters.

FOR THE LAST TIME, STOP TAKING MY GODDAMN STUFF. USE YOUR OWN GODDAMN LIP BALM. JEEEESUS!

[SLAM!]

I think the mystery is solved, as I hear the 15-year-old and 12-year-old getting dressed upstairs. I wince as I imagine the eight-year-old returning to school with a whole new dialect he’s picked up during lockdown. 

After this noisy start, the day settles. Productivity is a bit patchy, but at least something is getting done, even if it’s only Art homework and Lego construction. There are a few hours of restful harmony around the kitchen table, so I decide not to rock the boat by asking too many questions.

Sometimes you just need to enjoy it while it lasts.